Mercer Island Distorter Announces Open House

Dear Fellow Islanders and Readers of the Mercer Island Distorter:

It is with some pleasure that my family and our employees invite you to attend our First Annual Open House.

We have been positively nonplussed by the reception we have received since we started publishing Mercer Island’s only locally owned and operated original news source. We wish to commemorate this by inviting the members of the local community into The Distorter’s offices to meet our editorial board and our staff. My sister Mimsy may even be persuaded to make an appearance.

The open house will be held this Saturday morning from 10 A.M. to 12 noon at the Snugbottom Estate on South Mercer Way. Maps and mandatory release forms will be available on Saturday morning, exclusively at Island Books.

Food and drinks will be served to those who do not possess any especially irritating dietary restrictions.

We so look forward to seeing you then.

Letitia Snugbottom
The Mercer Island Distorter